Relationship Building: Keeping Up The Appearance

Bald man with good style on date

So you have been on a few dates, it’s going pleasantly well and she seems to really like you. Now it’s time to make sure you don’t fall into old, bad habits or forget about keeping up with your style and appearance.

I have already given advice to help keep you moving the right direction, Act like and Gent at all times and 10 top tips for grooming, both of which I try to focus on both your look and the way you act.

It’s important in the dating game that you stick to being who you are, there is nothing worse for a woman than a man who comes across as a real gentleman, courteous, kind, and polite to suddenly end up acting like a caveman or a nervous wreck.

Believe it or not, I have a couple of friends that have really messed things up in the past when things were going well. One, whom I won’t mention, thought it was best to keep his date keen so she’d be begging to see him, he kept making up excuses why he couldn’t meet on a particular day just so he could then say when he ‘was’ available.

At first, this worked and his date kept asking, ‘so when are you free’ but after some time, she got sick of the games and decided to forget him (even after he realised his games weren’t working and he started asking her).

My other friend, who happened to have a bald head, was doing really well with a new girl he had met; he’d done everything right, made a real effort with his appearance and grooming, made her feel special and was always planning new things to do on dates. He used to tell me how well things were going and how much he liked this girl. I was pleased for him as he’d struggled with dating for years due to a lack of confidence and to be honest, a bad dress sense!

After a few months of dating I noticed he’d not been on as many dates as he normally would have, I asked him what was going on.

For some reason, he had convinced himself that there was litle point in trying anymore as he ‘thought’ she wasn’t that into him.

I asked what gave him that impression, his response shocked me – he said that after the first few dates and the first few times they’d slept together he felt pretty comfortable that this girl was the one, she’d compliment him all the time on his look, how well he dressed and how he always made an effort with her. I was thinking, ‘so what’s wrong with this’ until he got to the next bit.

He said that feeling comfortable with her made him relax and in doing so he started to act a little different but he didn’t notice this was putting her off at the time.

Different in what way I said?

He explained that keeping up with all the grooming and dressing well was just too much effort now his date had started to show she was into him, he thought she’d be happy if he just wore his tracksuit bottoms and a t-shirt when she came round, it was more comfortable.

I explained that this might have been acceptable years into a relationship if you both want to just get your comfies on and crash on the couch, but whilst you’re still building the relationship this must have been a massive turn-off for her.

Instead of taking my advice to keep up with his appearance he just gave in and went back to his old ways, she, needless to say, went her own way too.

I think it’s critically important if you have been on a few dates with the same person and they are falling for you that you make sure you don’t let things go, keep up the styling and grooming, keep acting like a Gent and you might just make it to the next date.

Don’t end up like one of my friends and ruin a good thing because you’re too lazy to care.

Keeping up with grooming, styling and being a gentleman is important during the early stages of a relationship, it’s also critically important if you’re in a long-term relationship or married.

Keeping yourself looking good shows you care, it shows you also care what your partner things about you, which ultimately says – do you still fancy me!

It’s not hard to keep up your appearance, dress well and act like a Gent when dating, it’s much harder to keep on chasing after dates that run away when they realise you’re lazy, it’s not attractive and ultimately it will keep you on the dating scene longer than the rest.

Keep up the appearance & keep the date!

Paul Inman

Paul Inman is the founder of The Bald Gent. As the main contributor to TBG, Paul has years of knowledge, experience and stories to share with our users. His insights, advice and blogs form the backbone to everything we do and what makes being a true gent so important to the ethos of TBG.

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